Thursday, July 19, 2007
Laugh At The Laminati! Shiny Medallions For All!
I have a two-part plan of action to strike fear in the hearts of the Laminati. First, as a fundraiser, the Mateelians should print up “Reggae On The River 2007” laminates and sell them for, say, $20 each. That way, those who like to keep their laminates as souvenirs will have a complete set. It’s also a way for people to publicly show their support while raising money for the community center.
The second part is to print up laminates with a picture of planet Earth, with a choice of passes available, such as, “All Access, “Guest,” “Performer” or “Security.” Everyone could have the laminate that corresponds to the “shift” they see themselves doing on this planet. These could be given out for free by the thousands to whoever wanted one, thereby completely democratizing the distribution of laminates while subtly making fun of the original Laminati and their fetish objects.
Give everyone in Humboldtistan a shiny medallion and, essentially, no one has one. If done right, it will become embarrassing to be seen in public with a Dimikisbadi medallion because it would seem that such people don’t get the joke that they are the brunt of.
Alas, if we manage to get over ourselves and our medallions, humans (and especially Humboldtistanis) being what we are, some or other group would find some other way to set themselves apart. You’d think maybe we’d have gotten over all that by now, but old habits die hard.
Friday, July 13, 2007
Reggae On The Rubicon
Today I went south, over the border into Mendocinostan to do some work for a friend. While the trip went without incident, I had to be extremely alert while traversing the border region. The area has been the scene of recent conflict. Regaeishmir, a tribal territory on the north side of the border has been trying to fend off a hostile annexation attempt by the People of Dimikisbad, just to the south. After a bitter struggle, is seems that the Mateelians of Regaeishmir have temporarily conceded, though they have vowed to reorganize and take back the resources that many, or possibly a majority of, Humboldtistanis believe are rightly theirs.
This conflict came to a head recently when a dispute broke out over the payment of tribute by the People of Dimikisbad to the Mateelians. The Mateelians believed they were being unlawfully denied access to prophets important to the Mateelian community. This, they said, was in violation of historical agreements, so they purged some of the Dimikisbad ministers who had been hired to manage this region of Mateelian territory. This led to deep divisions within the larger Humboldtistan community. Long-standing clan allegiances and loyalties to tribal chiefs became more important than fact, reason and negotiation in determining public opinion.
Unfortunately for the Mateelians, many of the Dimikisbad sub-ministers, a cronyist cadre often referred to derisively by some Mateelians as The Laminati, sided with Dimikisbad’s People early on. It seems that most Humboldtistanis are either afraid to aggravate the Laminati, hoping one day to also be able to wear the coveted, shiny medallion signifying Laminati status. As a result, many, many people are unwilling to speak out against the takeover, even those who know it is wrong. This has allowed the Dimikisbadis to continue their occupation of Reggaeishmir, continue their piracy and to seize the prophets for themselves. They have now renamed the region, thereby taking the final step in their long-term plan of cleansing the Mateelians from Reggaeishmir.
The leaders of Dimikisbad and their supporters often speak of their actions in the most altruistic terms, attempting to hide the obvious reality of piracy and expropriation. They claim that their takeover is for the betterment of Reggaeishmir and, therefore, the whole Humboldtistan community. What invading army or corporate takeover artist doesn’t claim only the most charitable of intentions? Some occupying forces actually believe their actions are in the people’s best interest while others are just cynical liars. Either way, the effect is the same. In Reggaeishmir, some of the formerly ousted ministers actually call themselves The People and have been going out of their way to try and confuse the distinction between the best interests of the people and the undemocratic, proprietary interests of The People.
Some Laminati and their loyalists claim that their support for the take-over is “not political,” that they are “not taking sides” and that they are just doing their jobs in Reggaeishmir as usual. But when the actions of a small cabal of Dimikisbadis cause such controversy and division in the community, working with them becomes a political act, like it or not. By aiding the Dimikisbadis in any way, Humboldtistanis are not only lending practical support to the take-over, but—and this is probably far more important—lending moral support as well. If enough Humboldtistanis continue to work in Reggaeshmir as if nothing had happened, it makes it easier for the Dimikisbadis to perpetuate the lie that what they’re doing is for the betterment of Reggaeishmir and therefore all of Humboldtistan.
While most of the Laminati have wholeheartedly joined in the take-over and occupation, many of the day laborers who live in Humboldtistan and travel to Reggaeishmir to work have refused to participate since the takeover. I have worked in Reggaeishmir the last four years, but have joined in the walkout this year. For me, to cross that river would feel like crossing a picket line as a scab worker, something I can’t bring myself to do, not even if offered a shiny Laminati medallion as a bribe. Recently, there has been talk of direct action by a group calling itself something like Reggaeishmir Uprising. However, I’m worried that their actions may not be that well thought out, leading to some embarrassing and pointless confrontations.
It is with some trepidation that I post this. In doing so, I’ve now outed myself as allied with the Mateelian cause. This matters because Southern Humboldtistan is a small town and it is hard to be involved in community life if you run afoul of the Laminati. They and their loyalists sit on many boards of directors of organizations, they are involved in local media and politics, they run many local events and businesses and so on. This is similar to any cliquish small town where far too many people want to be big fish in their own little pond. I find it appalling that speaking out against something in Humboldtistan can get you blacklisted. Perhaps I’m being paranoid or hyperbolic, but I regularly speak with many Humboldtistanis who, for one reason or another are afraid to speak out against the take-over of Reggaeishmir. If Humboldtistan didn’t pretend to be such a progressive, peaceful place, it wouldn’t bother me so much. It’s hypocrisy I detest. I guess that after all these years I’m still a bit surprised when hypocrisy stares me in the face.
While, in public, the Dimikisbadis crow confidently about how they will manage Reggaeishmir for the good of all of Humboldistan, it is not a done deal. The Mateelians are pursuing legal avenues for redress while the resistance to the occupation is growing daily in Humboldtistan. This has been brewing for a decade. When the Dimikisbadis crossed the Eel River and annexed Reggaeishmir, they also crossed a Rubicon of sorts. No matter how many people in the Humboldtistan community call for reconciliation, it can probably never go back the way it has been. On the one hand, the Mateelians seem to view this as an opportunity to reclaim partially lost territory. On the other, the People seem to be trying to complete and solidify what, for over a decade, had been only a partial control of Reggaeishmir. The actions of both sides seem to say, “I challenge you to a duel.” Whether it is decided in the courts or the streets, this fight will probably decide the ownership of Reggaeishmir once and for all.
[Note to outsiders: If you don’t have a clue what this post is about, you probably don’t want to bother to find out. But if you want one side of the story, check out http://mateel.org/home.php and for details on the conflict and very recent events: http://mateel.org/rotr.php ]
Today I went south, over the border into Mendocinostan to do some work for a friend. While the trip went without incident, I had to be extremely alert while traversing the border region. The area has been the scene of recent conflict. Regaeishmir, a tribal territory on the north side of the border has been trying to fend off a hostile annexation attempt by the People of Dimikisbad, just to the south. After a bitter struggle, is seems that the Mateelians of Regaeishmir have temporarily conceded, though they have vowed to reorganize and take back the resources that many, or possibly a majority of, Humboldtistanis believe are rightly theirs.
This conflict came to a head recently when a dispute broke out over the payment of tribute by the People of Dimikisbad to the Mateelians. The Mateelians believed they were being unlawfully denied access to prophets important to the Mateelian community. This, they said, was in violation of historical agreements, so they purged some of the Dimikisbad ministers who had been hired to manage this region of Mateelian territory. This led to deep divisions within the larger Humboldtistan community. Long-standing clan allegiances and loyalties to tribal chiefs became more important than fact, reason and negotiation in determining public opinion.
Unfortunately for the Mateelians, many of the Dimikisbad sub-ministers, a cronyist cadre often referred to derisively by some Mateelians as The Laminati, sided with Dimikisbad’s People early on. It seems that most Humboldtistanis are either afraid to aggravate the Laminati, hoping one day to also be able to wear the coveted, shiny medallion signifying Laminati status. As a result, many, many people are unwilling to speak out against the takeover, even those who know it is wrong. This has allowed the Dimikisbadis to continue their occupation of Reggaeishmir, continue their piracy and to seize the prophets for themselves. They have now renamed the region, thereby taking the final step in their long-term plan of cleansing the Mateelians from Reggaeishmir.
The leaders of Dimikisbad and their supporters often speak of their actions in the most altruistic terms, attempting to hide the obvious reality of piracy and expropriation. They claim that their takeover is for the betterment of Reggaeishmir and, therefore, the whole Humboldtistan community. What invading army or corporate takeover artist doesn’t claim only the most charitable of intentions? Some occupying forces actually believe their actions are in the people’s best interest while others are just cynical liars. Either way, the effect is the same. In Reggaeishmir, some of the formerly ousted ministers actually call themselves The People and have been going out of their way to try and confuse the distinction between the best interests of the people and the undemocratic, proprietary interests of The People.
Some Laminati and their loyalists claim that their support for the take-over is “not political,” that they are “not taking sides” and that they are just doing their jobs in Reggaeishmir as usual. But when the actions of a small cabal of Dimikisbadis cause such controversy and division in the community, working with them becomes a political act, like it or not. By aiding the Dimikisbadis in any way, Humboldtistanis are not only lending practical support to the take-over, but—and this is probably far more important—lending moral support as well. If enough Humboldtistanis continue to work in Reggaeshmir as if nothing had happened, it makes it easier for the Dimikisbadis to perpetuate the lie that what they’re doing is for the betterment of Reggaeishmir and therefore all of Humboldtistan.
While most of the Laminati have wholeheartedly joined in the take-over and occupation, many of the day laborers who live in Humboldtistan and travel to Reggaeishmir to work have refused to participate since the takeover. I have worked in Reggaeishmir the last four years, but have joined in the walkout this year. For me, to cross that river would feel like crossing a picket line as a scab worker, something I can’t bring myself to do, not even if offered a shiny Laminati medallion as a bribe. Recently, there has been talk of direct action by a group calling itself something like Reggaeishmir Uprising. However, I’m worried that their actions may not be that well thought out, leading to some embarrassing and pointless confrontations.
It is with some trepidation that I post this. In doing so, I’ve now outed myself as allied with the Mateelian cause. This matters because Southern Humboldtistan is a small town and it is hard to be involved in community life if you run afoul of the Laminati. They and their loyalists sit on many boards of directors of organizations, they are involved in local media and politics, they run many local events and businesses and so on. This is similar to any cliquish small town where far too many people want to be big fish in their own little pond. I find it appalling that speaking out against something in Humboldtistan can get you blacklisted. Perhaps I’m being paranoid or hyperbolic, but I regularly speak with many Humboldtistanis who, for one reason or another are afraid to speak out against the take-over of Reggaeishmir. If Humboldtistan didn’t pretend to be such a progressive, peaceful place, it wouldn’t bother me so much. It’s hypocrisy I detest. I guess that after all these years I’m still a bit surprised when hypocrisy stares me in the face.
While, in public, the Dimikisbadis crow confidently about how they will manage Reggaeishmir for the good of all of Humboldistan, it is not a done deal. The Mateelians are pursuing legal avenues for redress while the resistance to the occupation is growing daily in Humboldtistan. This has been brewing for a decade. When the Dimikisbadis crossed the Eel River and annexed Reggaeishmir, they also crossed a Rubicon of sorts. No matter how many people in the Humboldtistan community call for reconciliation, it can probably never go back the way it has been. On the one hand, the Mateelians seem to view this as an opportunity to reclaim partially lost territory. On the other, the People seem to be trying to complete and solidify what, for over a decade, had been only a partial control of Reggaeishmir. The actions of both sides seem to say, “I challenge you to a duel.” Whether it is decided in the courts or the streets, this fight will probably decide the ownership of Reggaeishmir once and for all.
[Note to outsiders: If you don’t have a clue what this post is about, you probably don’t want to bother to find out. But if you want one side of the story, check out http://mateel.org/home.php and for details on the conflict and very recent events: http://mateel.org/rotr.php ]
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